In the wake of Courtney Love’s disclosure that Kurt Cobain was “well fucking hung,” other consorts of dead celebrities have come forward with their own surprising revelations.

“Liberace…that man had an anus that was simply majestic. You could back a Mack truck into that thing. And I do have a Mack truck, if you know what I’m saying.” (Wayne Newton)

“Liz Taylor was a supremely sexy woman. She had it all: the face, the curves, the legs. But the most incredible things were her areolas. Like Frisbees. Frisbees.” (Larry Fortensky)

“Biggie was just big. Big everywhere. Big heart, big talent, big gut, big cock, and testicles the size of coconuts.” (Lil Kim)

“I still dream of Edie Sedgwick’s amazing clit. When she would pass out, I’d go to sleep on that thing like a pillow.” (Bob Dylan)

“The sexiest things about Meat Loaf were his man-boobs. I’d suckle them like…what? He’s not dead? Good God, I just assumed that by now he’d have had the Big One, or choked on a Jimmy John’s pickle.” (Carrie Fisher)

– Jay Gabler